Charafantah's Cave

Is it just me, or have you ever noticed this…the only thing we (Egyptians and Arabs) are good at is talking.

Everybody is saying poems and poetry, writing stupid meaningless books regarding meaningless subjects (ألاسرار الخفية فى حياة حمادة حسين,,,,,الخلاصة الفتاكة فى السياسة يا ولاد ال****)

Watch the TV, all the talk shows, when they do not present singers or actors, they get the next best thing….poets and writers, they start saying crap and bullshit something like
الحلزونة ياما الحلزونة
I swear am not joking, i heard stuff similar to this on TV today….just meaningless crap.

I never saw an engineer speaking about any discoveries or any new technology.
I never saw a doctor (except dakatret el takhsess -diet- and dakatret el tagmeel) talking about anything that have a meaning or could benefit a sane human being.

All what we do is talk talk talk….7ata gam3et el dowal el 3arabeya (the Arab League) all what they do is talking.

The most famous thing the older arabs were famous for, was talking!

Get into a taxi,hair dresser (7ala2), sit with your relatives that you don’t see frequently…all what they do is talking…am not against it…talking is fine…but at least talk about something useful, something i care about.

Go sit with your friends 3al 2ahwa,,, the subjects are mainly one of the following:

• Haifaa wahby – new clips – mozaz
• El ahly – zamalek – abo trika
• wa7ed beyefty (non true stories)
• El doktor ebn el kalb ely mesta2sadny
• How shitty my life is

W howa da ely fa7en feh,,,kalam w bas….

Gmail is my favorite email, its clean, its easy, and the spam filter is just amazing!!!Its accuracy made me think someday that they might have real persons filtering mail manually!

Every time you log into gmail, you have that space counter telling you your space now is > 4GB and counting….it never stops!! are google invading the world of HD or something?do they have an army conquering all the hard disks and storage areas in the world and converting them to gmail?

WHERE THE HELL DO THEY GET ALL THIS SPACE!?!?

My first hardrive was 80Mb…that was 15 years ago….now my email storage is more than 4000MB now more than 5200MB 6155MB(30/12/2007)!!!

Also, dont you ever think to yourself, why is google is doing this for free?they have all these amazing services (search,webhistory,gmail,video,blogs,news,IG,suggest search,more,more,more) do you really think they make all this money from the stupid advertising?COME ON,, you never even clicked on one of these ads!!!

It cant be, I am sure (and i have proof for that) that Google are getting a fund from the Aliens and are planning to invade our minds and soul so they can takeover the world, and use our brains as storage for their AlienMail service.

If you know me well, then you probably know this: “I cant wake up” – END OF STATEMENT -
I can stay awake for 3 days without an hour of sleep, and i’ll be all good, no problem, but if i sleep….it’d be a miracle if you can wake me up.

I am scared of sleeping alone, for no other reason than if the house falls on my head, i will not wake up!

Anyway, i have to get to work before 10:00am, so i try to sleep as early as possible, and set the alarm on 7:30am which should be quite enough, as the journey from home to work is only 30mins….

But do i ever get there on time?nope! I keep snoozing the alarm from 7:30 to 9:30 IMAGINE!!!! i wake up (offcourse) having a headache.

I run like a maniac trying to get dressed, and drive like crazy to get to work….i park my car some time between 9:59 and 10:01, its a world record!!! but is that enough?nope… i still get into trouble, because by the time i get on my computer and sign in, an email is sent to my boss saying that am late :S !!!!

There must be something i can do here, like these old arabic movies, or Tom & Jerry, where they make a machine connected to the alarm, when it rings, a ball runs and hit a hammer that falls into a water bucket which floods on my bed or something.

When i had a GF, i never had this problem, she kept calling me on the time i need to wake up, non stop, she wouldn’t  stop unless she made sure am awake (though i sometimes was able to fake my voice and continue sleeping)…ahhh.. good ol’ days

So, to narrow down my options, here are the possible solutions, please recommend:

• Buy a slave and get him to wake me up in the morning
• Sleep at work
• Get a girl friend
• Marry an old rich woman (so i wont have to wake up to work!!!)

These are some funny IRC (remember that old chatting program?) thought i would share:

<[SA]HatfulOfHollow> i’m going to become rich and famous after i invent a device that allows you to stab people in the face over the internet
——————————
<Guo_Si> Hey, you know what sucks?
<TheXPhial> vaccuums
<Guo_Si> Hey, you know what sucks in a metaphorical sense?
<TheXPhial> black holes
<Guo_Si> Hey, you know what just isn’t cool?
<TheXPhial> lava?
——————————
<xterm> The problem with America is stupidity. I’m not saying there should be a capital punishment for stupidity, but why don’t we just take the safety labels off of everything and let the problem solve itself?
—————————-
<death09>my girlfriend broke up with me and sent me pix of her and her new boyfriend in bed
<ktp753>ouch.
<death09>yeah.i sent them to her dad
—————————
<Night-hen-gayle> I gotta go. There’s a dude next to me and he’s watching me type, which is sort of starting to creep me out. Yes dude next to me, I mean you.
————————–
<Sui88> 67% of girls are stupid
<V-girl> i belong with the other 13%
—————————
<studdud> what the fuck is wtf
————————–
< robT> Name ONE thing that your windows comp can do that my MAC cant
< bawss> Right click.
————————-
<Alanna> Saying that Java is nice because it works on all OS’s is like saying that anal sex is nice because it works on all genders
————————-
<Raize> can you guys see what I type?
<vecna> no, raize
<Raize> How do I set it up so you can see it?
————————
<Tsk> oiuyniyu98h987h89yh87y98yjn987j987y897yhkiuk;””
<Tsk> sorry.. there was a spider on my keyboard.
———————–

My Favorite Geeky quote (you will not understand if not programmer):

<Jumper_> for an optimist the glass is half full, for a pessimist it is half empty, for an engineer it’s twice as big as it needs to be
<Thraddash> for a programmer it has too few interfaces?
<Jumper_> for a programmer it’s a Basic Input Output System (BIOS) with a buffer overflow just waiting to happen

I am not going to discuss how awesome Firefox is, and that Micros0ft sucks, and that IE is to browsers like tamer hosni is to good music, because its obvious, and i dont need, its a known fact, did you know that 97.6% of IE code contain bugs?no you didnt, because i just made that up….but it doesnt make a difference, because am sure its true.

But instead, am going to tell you how stupid sites are, they think that everyone use IE and Windows! let me tell you: “YOU ARE A ****** ******* Idiot,,yes you!!!” i use Firefox and Linux, its the best combination ever, if you think no, then you are dumb, go away or i will shoot you!!! [1]

How come a website like Telecom Egypt not have something like that in mind?WTF! i cant view my phone bill unless i use IE?is that some kind of conspiracy?mesh kefaya enoko betesra2ouni already in my bill? ya betou3 edfa3 ba3d keda eshteky,,matkhalounish afata7 3elab, w a2aleb 3aleko el mawage3!!!

And the stupid Mazika, you are using DRM, good for you(i can crack it by the way! its stupid, its not safe), thats better than telecom egypt, instead of an empty page, Mazika displays a page saying that you need an IE browser! DOH, am not going to use your stupid site, because you use DRM and you force me to use IE!!! so are you telling me to use IE and windows?again?please refer to [1]

Bottom line is, TEST YOUR WEBSITE WITH FIREFOX YOU IDIOT!!!! USE STANDARD HTML!!!NOT THIS CRAP THEY DO IN  M$ TOILETS!!!

Use http://validator.w3.org/ to validate your site…make sure its compatible, if you make a public service, you dont expect the user to change his environment  to suit your needs, you should.

Even if the users will do so, I WILL NOT!!! and you *really* don’t want to piss me off…. at least online

i was browsing online today, i was listening to very nice music from KennyG and found a link to tamer hosni’s website(i hate the guy, i just opened the link to make fun of it) so i opened it in a new tab, and continued reading what i was reading.

And suddenly, out of no where, the fa***t was screaming in my ear “W BARDO LESA BETA3′LATY” in the loudest volume i could ever hear.

For God sake!!!! you frightened me, i hate you! mesh na2es 3′er enak tenzely mel 7anafeya ba3d keda!!!

That also reminds me of the stupid advertising on Egyptian websites (and some non Egyptian websites too), they display a HUGE flash advertising covering all the page, not only that, but sometimes displaying the close button after 10-15 seconds to force you to see the ad.

And sometimes the stupid ad is not compatible with Firefox and i just cant close it…..ahhhh…how many site did i close because of that?****HATE****HATE****HATE****HATE****

Websites should not display any stupid pictures\bestiality\gay p0rn\advertising\stupid sound\stupid music\anything related to tamer hosni\or hany salama UNLESS i requested to do so…. COME ON respect my privacy!!! a good thing i used to do is surf without Flash and JavaScript support, but that was a pain in the a$$ , 90% of the websites were not usable.

Anyway, i thought it was a good idea to mention that i hate tamer hosni, and i also hate stupid advertising, spammers and people invading my privacy and browser.